He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
Randomize
