We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
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