well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
Welp...herpes.
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize