I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
