yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
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