the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
Brb crying the tears of my youth
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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