Life lesson: if you fart while talking to a girl outside, the smell does not dissipate, it just lingers around mocking you
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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