office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Randomize
