Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Randomize
