another moral hangover. fuck.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize
