I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
Be still, my beating vagina.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
dude. I can hear the air.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Randomize
