Swine flu. Run for my life!
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
Randomize
