He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize
