You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Randomize
