We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
Randomize