Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
I think weed is turning my hair brown
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
Randomize
