I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
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