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• (561): View more from Florida

  I am going to give you the keys to my place

  (1-561): View more from Florida

  Then I'll give you the keys to my heart

  (561): View more from Florida

  Gag me

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• (310): View more from California

  Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.

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• (315): View more from New York

  I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree

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• (239): View more from Florida

  Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...

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  If You’re Hot, It’s Easier For You To Do These 27 Things

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (302): View more from Delaware

  I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn

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• (817): View more from Texas

  Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?

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• (778): View more from British Columbia

  some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.

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• (973): View more from New Jersey

  i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".

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• (423): View more from Tennessee

  There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?

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  23 Struggles Kids These Days Will Never Know

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.

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• (214): View more from Texas

  Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder

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• (703): View more from Virginia

  She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.

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• (218): View more from Minnesota

  last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.

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• (506): View more from New Brunswick

  What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?

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• (586): View more from Michigan

  Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.

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