C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
They left me at home... I'm a liability
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