But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
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