What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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