maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
THERE ARE LEGITLY 4 SEPARATE BITE MARKS ON MY DICK. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
Legitimately*
Go fuck yourself
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
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