Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Ketchup is God's man juice
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
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