Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
It's never too late to be topless.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
Randomize
