Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
Randomize
