i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
foreskin is a definite game changer
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
Randomize
