He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
I think people are normalizing furries
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
Randomize
