Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
