Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
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