...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
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