paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
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