I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
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