Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.