I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
pop tarts are not kleenex
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
Randomize