And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Randomize
