She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
Randomize
