okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Randomize