I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
