That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
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