They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
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