Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
I enjoy the company of your penis
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Randomize
