My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize
