she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
Randomize