Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
Randomize
