nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Your penis caused this!
Randomize