Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
Randomize
