I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
Randomize
