i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
