that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
The streets are paved with hand jobs
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