the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
Boobs speak an international language.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
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